Wealthy Parents / Jaded
So I completed 3 years at an investment bank and left after my bonus; I am now 6 months into a startup role and am on the verge of quitting. My quality of life in banking was at an all time low (as I expected, but I can't begin to justify staying in this type of work), even having maintained a decent fitness and diet routine, the lingering stress and hours of this job were just insane and startup life is similar hours wise (but to be fair at least there aren't partners/MD's breathing down your neck).
Anyways, I have broadly come to realize that this path really isn't worth it to me, my parents were immigrants and made it from '0 to 1' (came with nothing and did well enough for there to be a sizable safety net); it feels like best case, going down the IB/PE/startup employee path to achieve a 'similar level of success' (tbh I'm not good/motivated enough at any of this stuff to make tens of millions as an employee) to what they were able to doesn't seem like a great use of my life (I also have low conviction in the specific startup that I'm working at for various reasons).
I am broadly inspired to pursue an entrepreneurial path; I have the opportunity to join my dad/friends of my dad in a physical/industrial type of industry (where I would like to learn then venture off on my own with support of my dad/his partners) or alternatively just go down a totally different route (considering a consumer product startup based on some product gap in the US that I think is ripe for disruption).
Many of my friends stuck with IB/PE; I do respect it but many of them are having legitimate health issues (heart palpitations, early baldness, severe anxiety/depression and associated issues); and that is just 0% worth it to me. For some of them it's a legitimate way to achieve a better life / support their parents but I'm blessed to not be in that position. Just ranting
i know chicks from dynasty families and mid 8 figure inheritances still grinding it out in IB
I have seen this too and never understood it tbh
Because coming from money (and having it to fall back on) should never stifle one’s desire to make it on their own as well?
I agree with the sentiment but this isn’t the path I would go down in that setup at all. To each their own though
I think the disconnect is that these kids have the option to pursue a career that doesn’t pay a lot of cash up front (i.e. a passion / interest), yet they still choose the safe option (IB / PE). This easy to say, but who actually knows wtf they’re passionate about in their 20s.
Anyways I’ll get back projecting financials for a MM shit-co
I feel like these kids from elite families are either ultra driven and overachieving or they're super lazy and don't work. No in between
Are they single, which banks, and do they like sensitive young men?
I’m about 20 years older than you but not a dissimilar background.
To be clear, I’m probably a top 5% IB outcome 20+ years later so YMMV.
The reason I stayed in IB was partly because I liked it and things kept working out for me and partly because despite being very close to my dad, there was no way I would have remained close if I went into business with him.
Imagine if I had to tell him to F off about some negotiation point about my own comp (big issue in family business, got a buddy of mine whose family are billionaires who is my age, is the CEO, and he still negotiate with his dad for his comp) or had a disagreement on business strategy. It would have been a disaster because I don’t really take shit from people and he doesn’t listen to anyone (albeit very successful).
Everybody needs to choose their own path in life and if you’re miserable / not able to perform? Thats the main driver. But make sure you know what you’re getting into and whether you really want your family as an investor or employer (and when they own the majority you are an employee).
Very similar story - love my dad but don't want to be in business with him. Much easier to maintain that relationship outside of doing business together at least for me.. ymmv.
"I don't really take shit from people"
- Managing Director in IB-M&A
I was just gonna say, how did you manage to climb the corporate ladder if you don't take shit from people?
Yea, would echo what others have said.
Use your safety net as a confidence cushion in that you can behave a little less desperately than those worse off than you in the industry.
That callousness almost works in your favour, and you don’t lose everything if you get fired. Just find what you like in-industry and at worse, you leave in a few years with more reps and still can do something else with some downside protection.
Just because your parents are successful, it doesn’t mean you will be too, and that’s ok
So you’ve admitted to yourself that you’re not as motivated and hardworking as your parents, and your backup plan is to be an entrepreneur? What exactly is the thought process there? It’s not like being a business owner is any easier…
To OP’s favor, slogging through 20-30 years of corporate versus working hard at entrepreneurship are two different things entirely. Obviously neither are easy.
You make a good point, and as someone who's been a full-time entrepreneur for almost 2 years now, it makes me grateful for what I've built. Definitely sometimes feels like it's the harder road, though.
The choice to go work with your dad/his friends is clear to me for a few reasons here:
Overall, doesn't seem like there is a detrimental choice here, just encouraging you to think outside the box. Best of luck!!
I don’t understand being a long term W2 employee if you come from a wealthy family. If you come from a less well off background and highly value the cash pay, I get it. But generally no one is getting wealthy from a paycheck, even a larger finance paycheck (not talking about the outliers). People get wealthy from ownership. If you have the luxury of not needing the immediate cash because of family circumstances, it seems a waste to be doing any W2 job unless it comes with some ownership. I get it if you want to build a skillet for a finite time to go do something else. I highly valued the cash pay but have banked a good chunk and am constantly counting down until I feel covered enough to go build something for myself.
Totally disagree with that but again that’s based on personal experience. I see how much risk and hard work my dad to do to make his dough as an entrepreneur vs making high seven figures cash, having almost no work stress, having an army of people to do the real work, and having very smart people to manage tax and investments. Sure I’ll never be a billionaire but it’s a pretty low stress life.
And yes that’s super frustrating when you hang out with real billionaires especially when you know you’re smarter than them. But I’m too lazy for that
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