I don’t want to live anymore and don’t see a way forward

I spent all of college cold calling to get a MM IB job, even transferred to a t10 and left all my friends to get a better chance at IB because I had a PE internship and I wanted a shot at PE because I saw it as the most viable way to fonancially help my family.


i then left that IB job before the one year mark due to some drama and fear of getting fired. In hindsight my job was likely secure and I was just spooked by MD’s language. But because of my fear of being unemployed with all the stories on WSO, I left for FP&A at a portco a few months back.


this was the worst decision of my life. I hate this job and have destroyed the direction I had for all of college and sacrificed all social life for

Makes the same base as IB, but I live everyday realizing I gave up my shot at PE just because I was scared. And i have no idea what im doing and just feel like a bo accountant 


is there any way back to the ib->pe route? Is a msf even a good idea with a spotty resume? My old mentors wont even return my emails after learning i went to fp&a. It just looks like i gave up


i think i’ve ruined my resume forever and thus wasted all of college and just dont know where life is headed anymore. I dont know how to get back on a path to financial/career success and I just feel so lost and have no idea if there are any ways back to the success i fumbled


please help. I dont know what steps to take. Is networking even going to help? MSF? Or is there no way back to the chance I fumbled

 

hello. literally just an intern so i can't offer career advice, but i just want to say that you'll be okay my friend. just the fact that you're on this forum trying to figure out what your next move could be, the fact that you're reaching out to people, the fact that you have enough fire power in you to know that you can do better, is good and inspiring. it's better than what most in your position would do. you'll come back, don't give up. find new mentors, keep networking. your grit will count for something. keep living, there is always a way forward 

 

First of all, if you're feeling suicidal, I advise to just call 911 and they will take you to inpatient psychiatric care and likely give you some drugs to chill out. Some people might recommend the suicide hotline, but I think 911 will get you somewhere safe fast. 

Secondly, don't get so tied down to your job as your identity. People who only view their job as their worth are torn down if anything goes wrong. Get spiritual, talk to family and friends. 

Finally, you're reacting to stress in a negative manner. You have to learn to deal with stress in a positive manner through coping mechanisms. Some people go to the gym or have hobbies. One of my favorite stress relievers is a punching bag. A large heavy bag. Kick and punch the life out of it until you've got out all your stress. GL.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

Also, regarding a degree, I like the MBA path more than an MSF. The recruiting pipeline out of a top MBA is solid. 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

KoldKallKing

But you cant do pe out of mba without prior pe experience

Says who? Maybe you can say it is unlikely, but you can't say it is impossible.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 
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